unusual dreams 2002

these are the collected dreams of the perishable website users. feel free to provide some ad hoc analysis via email or add your own dream

2004 2003 2002 2001 2000 1999

oh, believe me, i know exactly how sticky and grimmy it is. i know its color. its weight. its smell. i just dont know how to clean it...

sounds like you have a case of internal moth balls....may i suggest a dust rag, vacum, or any other method of cleaning the forgotten corners of yer insides. spring may be too far off to wait for this cleaning, to show yourself just how badly you need a de-dusting, write your name on your heart with your finger, and wipe the newly removed sludge on something white. you need to show yourself just how old and sticky grimmy this stuff is, and more importantly, how it is different and therefore remove-able from you.....g

this mid-body of winter is killing me. everything dead and dead for awhile now. grey skeletal trees hanging upwards. a thick, coiled, weeping, and passive peanut butter like ball of something old, morbid and somewhat familiar breathing through my chest, day in, day out. help..
ugh. get a life.

I went to sleep wondering if our friendship was really over and dreamt that you drove to my house with your boyfriend and he left with my parents and you left with me. You were driving the car and it was snowing outside in large flakes. We went up to the grocery store and the large parking lot was now separated by a new low 10x30 oblong concrete divider painted yellow around its perimeter. The slab came up to my ankles and there were drifts of snow accumulating on all sides. In my head I was seeing a keyboard with a new button marked OS 61 or some shit, and you were hesitantly asking me that when I leave, would I take you with me. I was, in the dream and still am in my waking state, pretty much fucking angry and disgusted with your selfish ugliness, but I softened and said yes when I felt the past and the good remind me of who you truly are. When I woke up I knew that I still never wanted to see you again, but all the cool and really nice things that came and opened up into my being with your presence and influence, those I would take with me and leave you behind with the guilt and your guile.

i was on a bus and the bus driver wouldn't let me off at a stop because he had to go through some checkpoint first and i ended up in some sort of shopping strip in a gym where everyone acted like a woman, so whenever i played basketball my mannerisms were effeminate and then i played a game where i had to put on a purple teletubby-ish jump suit, weird
i was laying with some lover. some boy and our scars were softened. and we had halos of white or hoods. next...i was in my apartment and watched a bomb hit the foundation. and all the sudden the apartment was blown to canada. (damn.) and a phone call said "i want to see you before i leave chicago..." and i say , "you will have to take the ferry." there was mockery in his voice. and i doubted the ferry would come with him.
anna <mess_iah@thefragile.com>
with my father, who was very unstable, he lit fireworks off in the basement and i barely escaped, he tried to shoot off teh cap of a bottle, but shot my arm instead....i hate it when i get shot in dreams, it's been happening since i was a child. the worst is when you actually feel it, this last one was more like a bb gun. it stung, but i didn't wake up frightened or anything

we were together again even though the marriage never happened and it was years ago and we can barely be civil now. we were living together in our old rut, same decrepit apartment, same books on the dirty shelves, same arguments, same disconnects and lack of intimacy. she's still walking around in her ratty shirt, too busy to communicate. i don't want to be there, it's obviously a glitch in the program. hr sunken eyes just irritate me now.
I was in this record/book store that had to be accessed from a black marble tiled elevator. Once inside, I thought it was like a very dark "Fallingwater" (the Frank Lloyd Wright house). There were different levels. I found this old box full of these pocket sized foreign language dictionaries, each one was only $1. I was so happy because I thought I could buy them all. But there were 30 of them, and I didn't have that much money. I was bummed.
was standing in ront of buildings that were toppling, and the two doctors behind me conversed "does she know we are paused" i call over my shoulder, yes i know we are paused, and they tell me if i don't change it will keep repeating, and i say, "but i kinda like the beauty of decrepit buildings" and then the fake monster comes. i say fake because it looks like a comic book and while i laugh till my belly hurts, everyone else runs through a hall with bells and and buckets hanging from the ceiling, each frightened step making the bells ring, revealing their fleeting appearance.

me too. only they are chasing me like big bugs or rodents and im always hiding, then forgetting im hiding, then being chased again. it really sucks.
people are always trying to kill me in my dreams. it's starting to piss me off lately. f'in bastards should just leave me alone.
php <php@pastrysharp.com>
My girlfriend called me last night and told me that she had just had the most erotic sexual experience of her life --- with herself. That night I dreamt I was in my parents old bedroom with the boy I lost my virginity to. The windows were lower than in reality and about 3 inches from the baseboards. I was looking out the window out at the clouds and calling out shapes that I saw in them to my lover. I saw puffy soft cherubs with round rosy cheeks, chubby fingers and doughy arms of white fluff. I told him they were holding gold trumpets in between their legs. Then I saw the earth hovering in the air with a ring of white clouds wrapped around it from northwest to southeast looking like a bandage. I was super excited and tugged at his shirt telling him that the world was getting closer to coming inside.

I was watching some kind of live television program with only David Bowie’s head making facial gestures of surprise and joy. In the background he was singing one of his songs famous for dancing to I think, I love to dance, but I can’t remember the title. Bowie had pinkish lobster antennae moving in and out, sort of disappearing and reappearing above his upper lip and almost below his chin making differing foo manchu moustaches and goatees. His expressions of happiness kept common time with the music and the pop-up feelers coming out of his face and I thought “how clever and entertaining”. In the dream I couldn’t wait to tell you about it and share the experience because it was the perfect idea and it felt really good.

I tried to act like I played guitar eventhough I told them I don't know how to play after they forced me on stage. And after it was evident that I didn't know how to play they just looked at me funny and I felt guiltly after the set eventhough I told them I didn't know how to play. It still felt good to be on stage and have them think I was some kind of finger picking wizard. This all took place somewhere in Tennesse in some bar with some country band.
less_cunning <lesscunning@netscape.net>
GA Imperial America -
sitting behind the counter tossing white rosebuds spinning like tops and vanished around the corner a small mouse delights in one gato maya comes to steal teeth marks and all i umbrella her in my arms as she heals she grows into miguel, who is happy to watch me avoid hitting water with the three wheeled contraption in which we sailed.
my flute was in my hands, and she was bloated, bulbus and ready to erupt. the tarnish on her was flaking off and leaving trails of stardust behind her. i wonder, what, my dear musicians, could this mean? hmhm, i think she's ready, don't you?
gina <cephius79@hotmail.com>
wi -

i had a dream that i saw califone at the 400 bar in minneapolis.

cj <perishable@thelandingpad.com>
ks usa -
in these place i find very greatest music... my favorite is SINISTER LUCK. with that music i enjoy my lonely, melancholy,tranquility and when i so tired i heard it and enjoy too... very thanx you...
Veter WindMan <veter_all@yahoo.com>
i was engaged to be married to james gandolfini, irregardless of the fact that he's more than twice my age and embroiled in a messy divorce. true love conquers all, i guess. i was being interviewed by the "entertainment tonight" crew about my plans for wedded bliss and i said or did something that got james' family a little riled up. they told him they wouldn't speak to him if he didn't dump me and he got this look on his face that told me he was going to go along with their wishes. then he turned and walked away from me, down the long hallway of a house i'd been in before, although i have no idea when. i started sobbing and crying after him that i loved him and couldn't live without him but he never looked back. i was so brokenhearted i woke as if from a nightmare; with a start and sitting straight up in bed.
Maria <miss_maria@go.com>
U.S.A. -
it wasn't about the dream but about how i awoke. slight tingling sensation down the sides of my neck, as though something was entering and then exiting at an obscene rate, so quick i couldn't notice space between the movement. my heart was barely beating, and i suppose that it was only unnerving because it was natural, and usually i can make my heart stop only by will. dangerous, huh? it is one thing to turn off yer heart, but quite another to watch it slowly dissipate in the passing of one night. i woke up for the first time feeling as though none of this belonged to me and i was truly on someone elses good graces. what will it take, my first thought this morning, for me to realize that? not just watch that thought eddy around my conciousness, but intertwine and.....envelope me and bless me and kiss me and teach me how to rest.
gina <cephius79@hotmail.com>
tom petty. sleeping on the couch and i woke up in my dream to tom petty, who i somehow knew well, his shirt was off and he had a young body, not crusty and old like he should be. i told him to come closer, i wanted to touch him. he did. happy, smiley. he had jeans on and an erection. the whole thing was really nice...except for the funny confusion that the real tom petty REALLY bums me out.

I dreamt I was walking out of an old neighbor's house that I used to babysit for, the golden-haired twins if memory serves. A grey old rambler with double red doors in front of a short concrete walk way. It was really dark outside, could have been dusk or dawn, a twilight with a misty fog making it moist. I felt confident instead of afraid of the gloom, and making a left I saw at my side a companion, a small paunchy bull dog with a kind face and collar. As my new friend ran ahead, I took some steps into the street and saw one streaking puddle straddling the road as kids in shadow grey forms ran through it and past my left laughing in play. I leaned into all of them as they grazed alongside my ear and I cackled and blew out a scare just for fun. It began to get lighter and bleak with blurs becoming clear and in focus, but the sky was still shaded with clouds overhead. I turned up the street ,which started uphill, and thrust my arms out into the air like fins. It felt like swimming upstream, but without a real struggle. I realized I was attempting to fly, and with 3 or 4 more strokes I was up and shooting away with an ease and almost uncomfortable freedom. This part is fuzzy, with partial recall of a sweet and impossible sky dive maneuver controlled by what felt like the small of my back. I wanted to come down at some point and did so with fear of the feeling of asphalt skinning and scalping the top of my head if I didn't angle it right or lost my control. But I ended standing upright on both feet, in the boots I love to wear now actually, feeling grounded and facing back the way I had come. As I looked up from my landing, I saw that my dog, now at an island bend in the road, was sitting in a shallow marsh with reeds and all four legs visible only above the ankles. The marsh was raised and flat, and I wasn't sure why he had fallen behind or appeared to be waiting for some kind of caustic cue or command from me.

No local openers? These stars rock for and by their lonesome, not that I care but something just got stinky.
bufu <notsobitterindetroit@hautmail.cap>
MI it was half urine-ica -
i dreamt one night that i worked for perishable records in a menial job of some kind. like folding all the custom carboard sleeves for califone cd's. or that i had a radio show and perishable sent me lots of free things to play on the air. it was the happiest dream of my life. then i found ten dollars and with it, i bought tim rutili a pony like he has always wanted. (don't believe me? listen to deceleration one again, foo!)
ian <iacrowther@vassar.edu>
NY -
I was being approached by a ruddy looking bum in front of the majestic. Just as he was going to ask me for money I shouted "Fuck you." As I turned to walk away he whipped a 40-ouncer at me that was half full. I didn't know if it was beer or urine in the 40, but narrowly escaped it hitting the back of my head.
Amy <detroitbitter@hotmail.com>
mi - Tuesday, September 24, 2002 at 10:39:00 (CDT)
Smattering carrying a Mattering was showing a film of his work accompanied by a record of his songs on a phonograph player. Circus environment with bleachers surrounding a dusty arena and me on a wooden bench listening…you are in a yellow t-shirt on the floor below me cumming.

- Wednesday, September 18, 2002 at 14:24:18 (CDT)
i had 2 dreams: 1) it was the hottest summer day and i was on a bus driving to the beach. my boyfriend's best mate was sitting next to me by the window and we had one of those tinyest kisses that mean everything (P.S: no, i dont have the hots for him in real life :). the other people on the bus who i knew saw it happen and didnt seem too concerened by it. 2) i was standing at a small hill looking out over a great field of wheat. the whole area was covered by a huge glass dome that made the sunlight dull, but there was the lighest of warm breezes from somewhere
jenny bridges <amycorvus@yahoo.com>
australia - Wednesday, September 18, 2002 at 06:02:53 (CDT)
you whom i've only touched briefly walk into my bedroom and get under the blankets with me. i start to sin as i inch closer to you. your grin turns into a full green light smile and this makes me very happy. we kiss and i rub your thighs and stomach for a very long time. my hands leave images everywhere that i touch you. crosses and little birds line your legs. they first appear in black charcoal and when my hands pass over them again they come alive with color and light. i think to myself that we will have sex, but touching you is too good and i won't slow down. you yell for me to STOP! i can't, i'm in love with your thighs. and then it is too late. uncertain, i ask you if you came, you nod. my real life boyfriend enters the bedroom angry and ready to fight. he demands that you get out of the bed and in my mind we have done nothing because we stayed in our clothes. i yell this to him as the two of you stand in the doorway, but you are naked, so this makes no sense. he places his hands on your shoulders. you seem small and i know that you will not fight. you open your mouth and stillness fills the room. my boyfriend just turns and leaves.

- Thursday, September 12, 2002 at 12:25:55 (CDT)
Alright, so, I was at some random party at a random mansion. There was a t-bone steak stuck in my eye.. somehow. So, some guy walks by with an eye cleaning kit. I frantically wave him down, freaking out, yelling, "There's a damn STEAK in my eye man!". So he stops, and lends me his eye cleaning kit. He hands me the long cylindrical shaped casing.. i take out something that looks nothing like something that would clean an eye. It looked like an oversized syringe; long, glass, thing. So i'm about to clean off the dead cow in my eye.. when the eye cleaning thing starts barking and yelping like a dog. Being startled by this, i threw it to the ground and started kicking the syringe-cylinder-eye-cleaner, whilst it kept on yelping and crying and, now, wimpering from my excessive kickings. then I... woke up..
david mackinnon <saturnpeople@hotmail.com>
NS Canada - Thursday, September 05, 2002 at 02:37:58 (CDT)
It was duskish and I was driving in my car towards my house. I went to turn into Toorak Road from an intersection I'd never been through before and I got disoriented and turned right when I should have turned left. And I began driving up this metropolitan-type hill road. At the top of the road was the Prince Alfred hospital, where Vince is having an operation on his back today and has been since last Monday night. I went to park my car out the front and Jon was then in the car with me. For some reason or another, we decided not to get out and instead just drive away again. I reversed out of the spot, and before realising it, I had put a big horrible dent in the side of the car parked next to me with the front end of my car. It was an oldish, moderately nice black sports car. We laughed about it straight away and Jon said "You finally did it." We then hooned away down the hill. I asked Jon whether he could tell if anyone saw it or not; I was pretty certain no one had though. He said that he wasn't really taking notice because I was so casual about just driving away. We laughed. So we were driving back down the hill. And it was night. And then we were walking down the hill. In our old school uniforms. There were police at a car port shelter thingy waiting for us at the bottom of the hill and they pointed us over to a side area as they do to cars they want to pull over. WE shat ourselves and thought that we were in trouble for fleeing the scene of the car bingle. When we entered the side area though, there were people running all over the place and there were two or three other boys from our year also wearing our old school uniforms. I was confused. It became apparent that the police were then shuffling everyone from the streets because they were chasing these mad biker deliquent types around the place. It was almost like an urban warzone. Finally, a really big biker on a really big bike crashed a bit closer up towards the hospital. A swarm of police ran towards the crash. The biker got up, still obscured to me mostly. He took off his helmet and belted a police officer in the head with it, knocking him away. The police crowd dissipated and lost control of the situation. There was only the one biker, but he look evil and deformed and huge. he had combat weapons and knives and things and he was a little crazy or delerious perhaps from the crash. He threw shit everywhere. I attempted to throw weapons back at him in order to hurt him, but my throws were weak and ineffectual. The car port where a lot of us boys were hiding or sheltering was chaotic. There were peopel everywhere. It became a fearful warzone. Just one enemy. Scaring us to death without touching one of us. I looked up to a raised, separated part of the carport area and Mum, my aunty Rita and their friend Mara and some others were sitting there in the night on deck chairs, laughing at what was going on. I swore a lot and asked them if they realised how serious this was and how scared they should be. How in danger my life was. How this wasn't funny anymore. I ran around the back of the carport place. Jon wasn't around anymore. It was day again and there were yellow straw fields everywhere. There were now people in army fatigues. I was trying to gather firepower, but no one had any. I saw the tip of some sort of automatic firearm sticking out over the top of a tin roof somewhere, but it almost seemed like bait. I could hear the biker snarling somewhere. I took it anyway. The biker had let me take it. All we could hear was the wind and the sun shining. I fired my gun. It was an uzi, one of those hand-held automatic weapons. I can't remeber how it ended. I don't think there was supposed to be one.
simonjk <simonjk(at)hotmail(dot)com>
VIC Australia - Monday, August 19, 2002 at 23:38:33 (CDT)
watching from above, transparent ceiling 20 people in this world, with a hundred million mirrors and smoke to confuse me carefully i pinpoint a river, strip down to my skins, jump in. the bottom is cold, a man walking his dog could be interested in what i am doing, as he stands on a brigde to memorize his testimony. i am only cautious in my own suspicion that when all roads are open, i'd be caving into myself for lack of adventure, so caution and i have a brief moment and part. the moment gets longer and longer and longer and longer and longer. my attention gets truer and truer and truer. i feel my heart beating in my foot, and all roads are open. that's when i hit the water. and again when i sit onthe shore in daylight sunbathing so as not to soak my clothes.
wi - Monday, August 12, 2002 at 12:43:07 (CDT)
he will find his heart. or his heart will find him. or someone will come in pure love. without possession, agenda or ego in their mind. and they will gently show him. gently open his eyes to the love that is everywhere and everything. i'm not worried about him. if he's trying to see it he will. you shouldn't worry either. he's going to be just fine.

- Sunday, August 11, 2002 at 17:25:29 (CDT)
a dream i hated and didnt want to have had. a man with two heads and one body. one head was a thin lipped, thin skinned cruel older man, the other head was a kids head. lively, soft, rosy. a red breathing heart wandered in space around the room. floated like. someone said, "watch this. watch." and the man was looking in mirrors, which were all over the room. when the heart passed behind him in the reflection he'd squint at it and turn and swat it, like a fly. the person said "he's trying to see his heart. he doesnt know that it is there. he doesnt know what it looks like. he doesnt know his heart."
staying away
- Sunday, August 11, 2002 at 12:14:22 (CDT)
dream @ a bat under a mattres black bat that bit me,mother call me about there is a very dangerous animal in our house i when inside the house no one was there ,and i look under the bet and there a was a big black bat i chek under the matterss @ my hand and i gat bite
alexandra shimon <shimon1222@aol.com>
ga usa - Wednesday, August 07, 2002 at 14:58:26 (CDT)
there were hands in the clouds and the sun wasn't there there pretty violets floating on the surface of the water and a man without wrists or clear defenition hands me and in vitaiton, through the veil that divides us one word, doesn't matter what it said sent me to a place that i go to anyway, exsists as a calm spot in my head and others were gathered there as well what we were there for took no words to tell floating in the current, warm with elbows locked, pointed a purple flowers bloom to the north end of the room with out the walls or restrictions and i woke at peace, to know of family and though it's beyond it gets you through/reminds me why i'm here and what i need to do.

- Monday, August 05, 2002 at 12:51:37 (CDT)
ive been having what i call my reacouring "axel foley" dream. Im running away from some hired goons though its not like im really running its like my body is stuck in slow motion but my mind isnt and to run as slow as i am takes all my effort. Through some quick thinking i avoid them at everyturn but just barely. Oh yeah and i am in a disneyland/universal studios hybrid, which is probley some bent up hostility tward orlando. Im not eddie murphy, not myself, but somehow the proverbial me.strange things always happen throughout and the chase stops and its all forgotten, but as soon as its done they spot me and the chase is on again. @ some point the chase ends up going residential and usually ends with me crossing some kind of line they cant, like a state line but they are not cops? i drank a lot last night so if i did have this dream again then i wouldnt remember, but when i woke up i had the axel foley theme stuck in my head. I feel like putting a closed for cleaning sign on.....
hippy lippy <dank2001marcoesquandolas@hotmail.com>
IL pigville - Wednesday, July 31, 2002 at 14:16:32 (CDT)
tble top torture, music bleeding outward in a soft expression of unloved language when a spotlight approaches sitting in the drivers chair we've all come to the station we all hope that there's nothing there in a slow and muffled tone singing all the names of fantastic places that never made it past the gates modern dillusions come down for a dance in our well maintained vacancy saving it for redemtion in the heart of the city they've left it up to us and we're here so where are we going to start with this pretty catastrophe in a slow and muffled tone singing out the names of the moments we won't recall due to detrimental states tralllalallala, white wax and the smell of honey.
gina <cephius79@hotmail.com>
wi - Tuesday, July 30, 2002 at 17:11:34 (CDT)
me has a problem me ai a gripple me can't do anything right me still has just one life me does not like this one life
punkt <billbryson@gmx.de>
- Tuesday, July 23, 2002 at 04:53:17 (CDT)
sweeping ants into a dust pan, Im hoping earnestly they all kissed their little ant wives this morning.
Oren Wagner <watered_down_yoohoo@yahoo.com>
of North America - Friday, July 19, 2002 at 16:26:44 (CDT)
I dreamt i had just bought a farm or a ranch with a farm and the eagles showed up in a large pickup truck and trailor. They escorted a fine horse from the trailor and offered it to me. I looked at its teeth and then in its eyes and i realized it was crying tears like glue. Then i woke up. I dont remember joe walsh being there. bummer.
il U.S.A. - Tuesday, July 16, 2002 at 13:08:53 (CDT)
found myself in a bowling alley with all these overweight bald bikers smoking cigarettes wearing chaps and other leather articles of clothing, so i ran outside to find the sky had been turned black with polution from running motorcycles.. so i run down the block, making my way through the smoke the best i can, and the motorcycles start chasing after me like angry bulls and i can see they have faces that glow.. so i just kept running until they finally caught up, and i tried kicking them all over but there was too many to take on, and i ended up getting crushed on the ground by all these bikes.
jim <jdernoncourt@comcast.net>
mi us - Saturday, July 13, 2002 at 23:41:05 (CDT)
We drove in a big truck to a town that "has more prisons than the whole country has churches". First we were going to camp in an area of dirt, sparse trees, and scattered bottles/wrappers. Then, instead, we stayed at a hotel. The first thing I thought was that we should put chairs in front of the doors so that the escaped prisoners couldn't get in. I flipped on the TV - there was a very dark cartoon show for kids that looked very low budget circa 1962, mostly black, and orange, and other halloweeny colors. Very poor animation and grainy image. Couldn't tell if it was animation or amateur puppetry. It was about vampires or something bad like that. Then we went down to the hotel restaurant. It was huge, the size of a school caferteria. The next thing I know I'm singing a song called "Buffalo Joe" with about 20 other young men, barber shop harmony style. I was singing bass. We would stroll through the room singing this song. While I was strolling I saw that one of the fellows singing was a slightly chubby Asian guy. His face was painted dark brown like minstrel blackface. Later, after the rendition of "Buffalo Joe", I saw the other guys on the side of the road. I walked over there and they gave me a wooden box with cigarettes and little licorice-y flavor pellets inside. I think you're supposed to put the little flavor pellets into the cigarette. I knew that the pellets would taste awful.
tony <tonymog@hotmail.com>
MN - Wednesday, July 10, 2002 at 09:59:04 (CDT)
out of state drive for the second time this week. it's a surprise, it's going to be real nice to see him in the dark. i drive along the river with all the windows down. they are asleep so i tip toe into the cabin and crawl into bed with sara. she wakes up and we talk about her sister. i tell her that we need to make valentines for the few boys around. I gather up multi-colored paper, shiny foils with shapes of angels lightly cut into them and feathers. we make a few...i lose focus and walk outside to another cabin, happy to be there to surprise sophia. i pass two suited gaurds, one outside her doorway and the other sits near her empty bed, waiting. they stand and i'm in danger. they shoot at me as we run through the trees. i turn into sophie during the chase. they hit both of my wrists and my feet with their bullets, christ style. i make it back to sleeping sara and ask her where dad is. she tells me that he is in africa and to look at the air in front of the tv because it is shimmering like a mirage. i feel an evil presence and i'm so frightened that i start to black out. i struggle with my words. i try to demand that all of the negative energy in the room join the light, but i am weak and my words mean nothing. the mirage takes on the form of dusty grey cobwebs on the ceiling blown by some unseen force. i bleed to death as sara speaks for me in a strong voice.

- Tuesday, July 09, 2002 at 16:42:12 (CDT)
repeatedly woken to the sounds of an angry furnace, she suggested cuddling with me many times before, usually uninterested, this time I lept from my slumber (or so i thought) wearing a gas mask complete with attached voice-encoder, she jumped back to the far wall, frightened, followed her lead, then offered a handshake and some words I can't quite remember.
- Monday, July 08, 2002 at 16:37:16 (CDT)
i had a lovely dream last night that i had a small child with dark curly hair, raven black, and clear mirror like eyes that when i looked into them, i heard a sound like wind chimes and water. i was so happy and stunned that she was mine (i didnt even remember being pregnant, i thought to myself in the dream) that i bawled.
lioness <lioness@arczip.com>
- Friday, July 05, 2002 at 18:06:56 (CDT)
On a metro bus, Alan Rickman in a black trenchcoat, head in my lap. I massaged his temples as he told me his troubles. We drove into a Hostess factory, seemingly abandoned. The floor was covered in powdered sugar; we made giant crop circles in the powder. Alan went to the back kitchen as I circled and circled, and he emerged with a sterling silver english tea set, and handed me the best cup of tea I'd ever had.
erika <campbelldrury@uswest.net>
WA USA - Sunday, June 30, 2002 at 16:16:10 (CDT)
I dream iwas going in to a garden an only a few could get in. it was dark be for we gotin, and as we went threw the door it was sunny, an i saw theses big statues the where huge. reaching the sky. one was a horse an chariot an one was a hug man with a spear i think it were others but i can,t remember them. it was a beautiful sight.
Lavion <lavion611 Yahoo@.com>
mo - Saturday, June 29, 2002 at 23:48:38 (CDT)
Last night right as I went to sleep, I had a dream that it was winter, and I was riding in a car with a man. It was snowing, and I noticed there were little men, about 2-3 feet tall, running around, made of blowing snow. The car hit one, and it kind of flew up on the hood, and rolled off. I was like "Aw shit!" and woke up about that time, and went in the kitchen. I saw something in the shadow, and noticed it was one of the men! It wasn't snow it was more of a misty substance. I got pissed off that it was in my house, and tried to grab it by the neck. It put me in some sort of psychic hold though, and I couldn't move at all. When it came towards me, full of ill will, I was able to break free and kick at it, but it got out of the way, and that's when I woke up for real.
Adam 'Buzzin Beast' Boysen <robotica@robotica@rocketmail.com>
MN - Tuesday, June 25, 2002 at 16:22:18 (CDT)
The other night I had a dream where I was walking through a shopping centre with an old ex looking for chemists that had canoes we could use for abortions. The old gf didn't speak the whole time, she had this strange peaceful look on her face, almost as if she was finger fucking herself after a relatively smooth labotomy procedure. Each chemist we tried made us wait outside and proceeded to point and sneer at us without even looking for the canoe we needed. It was getting dark. The second last chemist told us that there was a place that could help, but to 'watch out for the retards.' Finally we reached the large chemist and after being told to stay outside they went to fetch the canoe. As I was waiting though, a number of severely retarded people started forming a circle around me. I focussed my attention on one tall, hunched woman in a flowing, faded floral dress. She was blind and deaf with a walking frame and had welts and bruises all over her face and neck. I had headphones on. She came closer, a look of evil coming across her face. I couldn't move. She didn't care about my gf, who just stood there looking gorgeous. The headphones began playing a 60 minutes documentary of this womans attempt to live a normal life, and the volume increased in direct proportion to my fear. So frightening was this scarred mute women about to bludgoen me with her walking frame, that I didn't notice that my canoe was ready and around 15 other retards were also about to attempt homicide. I awoke in a sweat and stumbled out into the kitchen, only vaguely aware of what i was doing. I reached for a banana. My housemate looked at my t-shirt and said - "What's that?" "Oh - it's a turntable" I vaguely replied. "No - the circular wet patch just above your waist." I didn't know what to say. The five people in the kitchen stared uncomfortably at each other as I grabbed the banana, now unsure as to whether I really wanted it.
Peter Nicholson <Peter.Nicholson@auspost.com.au>
vic Australia - Tuesday, June 04, 2002 at 15:39:43 (CDT)
I was in the toilet making a poop.
cristina guerrero <cristina@guess.com>
ca usa - Monday, June 03, 2002 at 15:53:09 (CDT)
I had a dream that a friend of mine was killed by living dead people and they were chasing me but y friend killed these 2 girls and he was telling me that he didnt do it but he was allready dead so we were getting away in a car but he wasnt allowed in because he was dead and would be eveil.It was weird. what does it mean?
Kendra <Kendra1228@aol.com>
oh US - Friday, May 31, 2002 at 16:23:16 (CDT)
we start out with a set of big black wings. nothing too outrageous, but i don't kow how to use them smoothly. the first half of the dream is spent learning the fine art of flying in a maze of a house which reminded me of an mc ecsher (sp?)drawing. black and white tiled floors, hard wood walls that range from ebony to mahogony in color. i seem to swing back and forth from an imaginary point. my attempt at landing is weak, i fall short and land on my butt, laughing. as i stand a friend joins me and we walk forward as the scene transcends into a vacant stip mall. there is one room that others have gathered in. within the crowd i recognize two animals, a black lion whose fur turns red as the light hits it and a snake that no one else seems to know is there. the mystery provokes me and i move towards this miniature snake. her size explodes as i notice her, she expands like a cobra, but her insides are glowing with a rich, saturated green. her insides are barely visable, and small green lights sail up and down her length capturing mygaze hypnotically. she speaks inside my mind. "what is your answer?" i look up dumbfoundedly. "what's my question?" i say out loud. she laughs, almost violently and markedly questions my ability to be "playing like this". i turn around and feel cleansed, bereft of a stress in my heart. i turn around and kurt cobain is in my bedroom, we are watching me sleep. he rips on me for spazing out while snoring. i laugh at myself too. then he says, should we do this? and i reply yes. a microphone appears and he teaches me how to not be timid in front of it, how to toss it and abuse it as though that violence helps me to overcome stage fright. and that's it if you've made it this far.
gina <cephius79@hotmail.com>
wi - Friday, May 24, 2002 at 18:52:24 (CDT)
the blonde nephew-guy from "judging amy" wound up in a dream i had- there were some boys next door who ran in laughing and told us they saw what they called hamburgers in the basement windows. what it was, was two men having sex, and i guess their asses were visible through the windows. one of these guys i suddenly suspected and knew was my boyfriend, who came up looking like robert downey jr. the other guy was the guy from "judging amy". a little disturbing.
- Wednesday, May 22, 2002 at 10:00:52 (CDT)
my dreams alternate between breathing underwater and flying in some form (hope that made sense)sometimes i dream of flying underwater, so i guess something inside is just a bit screwed. please help. these dreams arn't scary but it would be nice to know wat the hell is goin on
amy <amydohnt@hotmail.com>
australia - Monday, May 20, 2002 at 06:54:25 (CDT)
ok... this is kinda nuts but eh... i dreamt i was in the movie annie, you know the one with miss hanigan (the bitch), and daddy warbucks. yah ok no big deal right? but for some reason, and maybe i was in a weird mood, i dreamed that miss hannigan was really horny, and was having no luck getting laid. then i dreamt that she made us all get out peaches from the refridgerator, and she taught us how to give oral sex. i think her intentions were for the orphans to indulge her, but i didn't get to that part. i ran away after that. i think i slid down the garbage shoot. so it was weird anyway.
fl usa - Sunday, May 19, 2002 at 21:17:54 (CDT)
hold not a thought that speaks for itself
- Wednesday, May 15, 2002 at 04:49:59 (CDT)
I don't dream much anymore and when I do the dreams are quite unremarkable but, I used to dream I could fly. It was always indoors and really easy. All I had to do was feel like flying and... viola! I'd be hovering near the ceiling. I sure wish I still had those dreams.
Tony P <jessica@citilink.com>
MN America - Tuesday, May 14, 2002 at 13:08:20 (CDT)
I had a dream like three nights ago, and in the dream tim r. was doing one of those unplugged shows-just him and an acoustic guitar. tim opened with working class hero. It might seem hokey but it was really good and cool. foy

OR - Saturday, April 27, 2002 at 11:24:44 (CDT)
i had a pet monkey. one of those really little ones that could fit in your hand. i was living in a camper like thing and when other people would eat i would look at what they didnt use, like for instance celery scraps, and pick those up and give them to my pet monkey. yeah.

mn - Monday, April 15, 2002 at 08:15:30 (CDT)
brain enzymes dripping out of a hole in my chin.
elliott <maaadkow@yahoo.com>
WI US - Saturday, April 13, 2002 at 13:27:51 (CDT)
A black car pulled up next to me. There was a young girl staring at me through an open window. When I walked toward her, she started to raise the power window, and my whole body went into super slow motion.
Peter <pflory@ameritech.net>
IL USA - Sunday, April 07, 2002 at 04:57:38 (CDT)
i was on a cruise ship, cruisin. All a sudden it flies into the air and does a loop like a roller coaster. evrybody threw there hands in the air, like a roller coaster. then we crashed. upper in the aft appeared an after raft...
- Sunday, April 07, 2002 at 01:47:19 (CST)
My dad was shutting down the blinds in my bedroom and warning me that he felt an event of some sort was going to happen to me. "Take care, ‘cause I know some no good green horn is coming up this way soon".
hwa mee kim
- Friday, March 22, 2002 at 11:11:48 (CST)
I was running across a vast flat snowy expanse with a few people, one of whom was my wife Laura. As we started running, she said that she was afraid of lions. I said "Oh, don't worry, I'll protect you". Then we start running. She's about ten feet in front of me and what do we see in the distance? A huge lion. He starts running in our direction. He runs around us and then runs off into the distance again. We keep running. Laura is still running in front of me. I wish she was near me so I could at least attemt to protect her if I needed to. Then we see the lion onthe horizon again and he comes running at us again. He runs behind us and then goes running past me and grabs Laura's arm dragging her down to the ground. Fuck! My wife is being killed by a lion. I wake up.
tony <tonymog@hotmail.com>
- Wednesday, March 20, 2002 at 09:17:20 (CST)
I don't know where I am when a beautiful woman appears with bright red lipstick,wearing a red gown,and over the red gown she is wearing a blackish brownish robe thats billowing in th wind also her brown hair is billowing in the wind,and she is just standing there looking at me,and I feel as if I know her,then she disappears.
Ryan <redafoe@twcny.rr.com>
NY U.S.A. - Saturday, March 16, 2002 at 07:23:16 (CST)
I dreamt that I would steal Syd Barret's bike. That was the strangest dream I ever had. Quite sad, isn't it?
David <holychocolatecow@firemail.de>
- Friday, March 15, 2002 at 07:49:35 (CST)
im in the carpark of our superstore thingy and the sky is bright red (not the best part).in the middle of the car park is my gerbil cage, only its as big as a house and the gerbils are as big as horses and there are hundreds of them. i go to the side of the cage to stroke them when i notice that one of them is extraordinaly fat and has long back legs, and the other next to it has a huge swollen arse that hangs down to the floor. the fat one is giving birth, loads of others ruch forward and they all have human hands, the fat one rises up and produces not baby gerbils but little glow in the dark aliens with big black eyes and smilley faces. the ones with hands try and grab them but they start boucing all over the cage smashing things up untill one hits me in the face and i wake up.
lucy-lou <chocolate_eating_monster@hotmail.com>
united kindom - Wednesday, March 13, 2002 at 16:06:13 (CST)
im in the carpark of our superstore thingy and the sky is bright red (not the best part).in the middle of the car park is my gerbil cage, only its as big as a house and the gerbils are as big as horses and there are hundreds of them. i go to the side of the cage to stroke them when i notice that one of them is extraordinaly fat and has long back legs, and the other next to it has a huge swollen arse that hangs down to the floor. the fat one is giving birth, loads of others ruch forward and they all have human hands, the fat one rises up and produces not baby gerbils but little glow in the dark aliens with big black eyes and smilley faces. the ones with hands try and grab them but they start boucing all over the cage smashing things up untill one hits me in the face and i wake up.
lucy-lou <chocolate_eating_monster@hotmail.com>
united kindom - Wednesday, March 13, 2002 at 16:06:12 (CST)
I dreamt that I was in the WTC trying to escape before it all came crashing down. I was running down the stairs from one of the higher floors. I was running so fast that I was almost flying, out of body style, from landing to landing. The building started to crumble down behind me and I just kept running/flying. I wasn't sure if I was still alive and running or if the building collapsed on me and I was flying now out of habit.
- Wednesday, March 13, 2002 at 13:13:27 (CST)
It was 6:46 AM. I looked at my phone and noticed that he'd called at 6:42. At 6:44. At 6:46. But he never left a message. I woke up at 6:46, but he didn't call once or thrice.
- Tuesday, March 12, 2002 at 12:35:38 (CST)
She said, "You need to act fast when you're under a tree and feel desire because the wind blows it away." I'm with a group of 5 or so and there are other small clusters of people around. Most of them are in the lodge, but a bank of french doors are open, so no one is really seperate. A few of us are outside under the night sky. My group is in a large hammock. One by one people drift off to sleep in mid-sentence. It seems that I chose the music that randomly plays. I notice how well it fits with the "work" that we are doing. When the cd's stopped, an old CSNY record dropped into place. I believe that I am the only one who is up to hear it. It is unfamiliar and I feel impelled to walk over to the stereo to investigate. I hear one last group of souls awake by the pool. Some loudmouth's voice wanders through the open doors. He sounds drunk and is attacking a women he'd seen earlier for ??? something about flesh, breasts and desires. I start to feel her shame and I observe myself wanting to deny my desires or desirability. I flash to a scene of myself in a 50's style bathing suit and heels. I feel panic and exposed instead of powerful and desirous. The last song pulls me out of my sudden desolation with a message wrapped in feelings that melts all of my doubts away. I lay down and am carried off into sleep.
- Monday, March 11, 2002 at 13:25:20 (CST)
TX U.S.A. - Saturday, March 09, 2002 at 18:53:51 (CST)
I was at the beach once with my mum and dad and I found a cave with my cousin and I went down the cave and I heard a roar and I looked behind me and there was a monster he started chasing me and I found a turn off that leads to the sewer but it went round in circles and I kept going down it again and again so when I realised it went in circles I hid under the water and my cousin kept running in circles and I heard the monster say all I wanted was a pair of perfect drums
Eden henderson <chris@paintballgear.com>
- Wednesday, March 06, 2002 at 03:53:38 (CST)
Ah, this is the one you've all been waiting for... I was being chased down the strip in Vegas by some unidentified women. She waived a shiny piece of paper at me and insistently mumbled something about a subpeona. I was to go to court for unlawfully filing a claim with Firestone tires for a vehicle that I never owned, and a tragedy that never occured. Apparently i had settled for hundreds of thousands of dollars and I went to Vegas to gamble thug-style. She had me arrested and I never laid foot in the casino. I only wish that were true. Damn, whose the schiester now?
- Tuesday, March 05, 2002 at 11:01:22 (CST)
Francis lived in the row of houses with my grandmothers sisters down the block from us. When we were kids we used to go to her house and she’d give us butterscotch hard candy.. I haven’t thought about her for years... In the dream she tells me she’s done. She wants to die. She opens the fence in her backyard to a field. She opens all the doors to her little ranch house (in the dream her house has many doors.) She grabs a small club and hands me a large wooden boomerang. lots of bears start filtering into her yard through the fence from the field. Lumbering sluggish curious. All sizes and breeds of bears. They are in her yard and she’s taunting them-“c’mon you motherfuckers…” She clubs one and it makes a little bearish whine. More surprised than anything. The bear shakes it off and swings his heavy paw at her and knocks her to the ground. “iss’that all ya got???” More bears are coming into her yard and rooting around her house through all the open doors. bears with their faces in the refrigerator and bears scratching the black build-up out of the oven and tasting it off their paws. in the closets. sniffing at the static on the t.v.... I start whacking bears with the boomerang. They seem slow and drugged. They seem like they don’t want to hurt us but it feels very satisfying to hit them. I dodge a heavy slow paw aimed for my face. i feel the wind from it.. Francis is not that quick. I’m going from room to room stealing her things. Filling my pockets with photos and watches with one hand and beating bears with the other. Feels like a clockwork orange kind of violent dance. I feel untouchable and immune from guilt, pain and bear retaliation. Francis is being beaten by the bears. For every one hit she gets in with the club there are three huge cuffs. Mostly to her head and upper body. she is bloody and reeling like robert deniro in raging bull. She is wearing an old orange housedress and slippers and she looks like she’s in her late 70s. not too quick. She wants to be killed and the bears are not moving fast enough. Pretty soon the press shows up. photographers, cameramen, reporters, people magazine. The bears are so slow that the media is able to stay out of danger. Francis is taunting the bears and yelling to the news people “didja get that shot? Here’s one fer the front page..fuckin bears…? She is explaining that she is done living and this is how she wants to go out. Yelling it at the newspeople without stopping the action.. The cameras are catching it all. I’m in the shadows just hitting bears and stealing stuff. Joyce, francis’ middle aged daughter, and louie, her son, show up. they are the only ones visibly upset. They are both screaming “MA...MA STOPPIT!!!” They are the only ones afraid of the bears. There is blood on my boomerang and francis is getting bloody too but she keeps getting up. there are a few bears down but they look like they are resting on the lawn. I’m mostly in the house now and the bears are wandering in through all the open doors. I can see a swarm of photographers behind a chain link fence as francis lures some bears in so that they can get an over the shoulder.p.o.v. shot of bears mauling her.. lots of action. Her children get more and more upset. they're both crying hysterically screaming at francis. the bears keep coming. francis is rising slower and slower each time she is hit by a bear. she's getting tired. she'll be gone soon. i think about saying something to her kids to get them to stop crying but i dont. I wake up.

- Monday, March 04, 2002 at 12:59:38 (CST)

- Monday, March 04, 2002 at 11:53:08 (CST)

and to entertain all of the guests, i started cutting off my fingers. Everyone was amazed and thoroughly entertained. Laughter abounded. I continued to cut off all of my fingers, delighted to bring such joy to so many. Until we arrived at the hospital, only to find out that there wasn't anything they could do for me... i was to go on without fingers :(
dave <dave24dr@hotmail.com>
ok usa - Wednesday, February 13, 2002 at 22:18:04 (CST)
The dream: It's sometime in the evening. I had just woken up. I walk over to the bathroom and flick on the lights. I notice in the mirror that there are things crawling in my hair. "shit...lice." I look closer, it's not lice. They looks more like little white maggots wriggling around. I then part my hair and lean in closer only to notice they aren't maggots either. Now there was only one creature moving about...a tiny white goat with only one horn on its head. As i stare at the mirror, the goat leaps off my head, leaving magical trails as it bounces around the bathroom. END
kristina <epiphaino@hotmail.com>
ON canada - Wednesday, February 13, 2002 at 16:04:41 (CST)
I used to have this re-occuring dream where I am flying on a magic carpet through a gigantic hallway whose walls and ceilings consist of impressionistic paintings. At the end of this hallway is a huge workbench where I am placed underneath it to pound immense wooden pegs into the muddy ground below.
Jason Gould <021635g@acadiau.ca>
NS Canada - Saturday, February 09, 2002 at 20:02:25 (CST)
My dream was about there was this white horse and a hole bunch of people trying to catch it. It had no wings and was not a unicorn it was flying around.
Mel Wardle <Plum71@Hotmail.com>
- Friday, February 08, 2002 at 10:18:04 (CST)
i've lived in chicago for 4 years and have made many good friends in this lovely city but as i prepare to move i must share this strange dream with all of you. I awoke in my truly huge and enormous studio apartment located in the beautiful area of chicago know as Lincoln Park and as i walked between the 2 rooms i could hear this gentle cracking noise. crrr-crrr-crrr-crrr. i soon realized that it was not eminating from either of these sunfilled rooms but from somewhere else. As i paused in my eat-in kitchen the noise got louder CRR-CRR-CRR-CRR. now this was getting the best of my intrigue and i knew the denouement was forthcoming, i just knew it. that's when it hit me. it hit me much in the same way your mother will phone you the minute you walk in the door with your hands full of groceries and various sundries. the way your dad always knew you were keeping a bit of his gas money to buy cigarettes. the way your older brother knew you had tried to play stairway backwards. it was the turtles i had planted in the rather large walk in closet and they were ready to hatch. they could not have timed it better for i had decided recently to move back to memphis. then just as i knelt down to pet one of the turtles, the little fucker snapped and ate my left middle finger. i guess i was so startled that i awoke knowing only one thing. it was time to move back south and give up the conveniently located apartment that is a mere half block to the wellington brown line stop. i'll be taking the turtles with but the apartment has to stay and i'd like it to have a good owner before the rent goes up. if only there was a way to reach people in the chicago area who may be interested.
Savannah <savcoll@yahoo.com>
IL USA - Wednesday, February 06, 2002 at 17:29:58 (CST)
circus nets and ropes criss crossed the ceiling of this dream. a man in a blue and yellow silk costume and ballet shoes approached me with a razor blade wrapped in pink bandages. he handed it to me and told me to unwrap it and hold it in my palm. he gently closed my fingers around the blade, pressed my fist between his hands and slowly added pressure. we were looking into each others eyes instead of at my hand. his hair and eyes were dark and i found some soul in them. i made him stop with unspoken intention before i was cut too badly. i then took him through the streets looking for eye incident, i knew that she was who he needed. we found her on the tight rope and i left him and the razor blade with her...i then went into a bar and a man stood behind me who i thought that i had loved, but anxiety is not love and i never looked at him once. i emptied my pockets out onto a table. i had been carrying a 2000 year old rare copper coin with early christian religious imagery on it and a pewter bhudda head that had remnants of a clay covering. both items were tremendously powerful, but i didn't know how to use that kind power.
MN - Tuesday, February 05, 2002 at 10:44:14 (CST)
forti i califone!!...ma me li son persi in conchetta!!!...alla prossima kisses
ago <vitto.vi@genie.it>
italy - Monday, February 04, 2002 at 13:38:12 (CST)
Here's a few to liven things up.. Dream.. I'm in a hotel with a lot of ppl from rehab. We're chillin in our rooms after curfew (I got my own hotel-style one in this dream) and then this black chick comes and knocks, I let her in. She's got this negative vibe. Then all of a sudden we're abotu to have sex -- when there's another knock at the door. It's this weird guy, mumbling to himself (shadow?) so I decide not to answer it. Well, he splits himself straight down the middle, unzipping himself kinda, forms two seperate fully-formed halves, somehow busts down the door into the room and starts chasing me around. I'm about fucked, cornered in the laundry room/kitchen, then he just says, "Hey, want a cigarette?" so I took it and went back to my room and smoked it with Black Chick. Wound up asking her if that shit really happened, even in the dream I was skeptical. FIN. Dream.. I got a phone call from someone and had to walk all the way out past the cattleguard of the rehab place and into the dusty road and used this payphone there to call it (prolly representing what happens after I get out of treatment). After talking for a while, it turns out to be my ketamine dealer. I ask him to reserve me a vial for when I got outta rehab, and he sez, "Sure, no problem." Then he comes over and vists me, and we play Chrono Trigger in my room (??) the whole time. FIN. Dream.. Infinitely complex to remember. At the end I was outside rehab, except it was in an Amazonian jungle, and this 7' bushman guy comes hopping out of the woods, doing amazing dances/stunts.. This Hindu guy tries to fight him, but the bushman loses the animal he was chasing after. The Hindu & Bushman turn out to be friends after all. Then the Bushman comes over and looks at my mom & I. He greets my mom & shakes her hand, then he comes over to me and, after shaking my hand, gives me like this weird embrace for a long time, and I got the Higher Level vibe that he was healing me on a really deep level. Then he hopped back out to the woods. FIN. Haven't had any really deep dreams since that last one a few months ago, I think it signals resolution of current issues.. Peace Out
Alberto Balsalm <mort@aphextwin.zzn.com>
TX USA - Monday, February 04, 2002 at 02:25:22 (CST)
I dreamt that my penis was one of those plastic battery operated fans with the folding blades.This was really funny to me both in the dream and when I woke up.
OH USA - Thursday, January 24, 2002 at 12:45:57 (CST)
There was some sort of WTC memorial day happening. It was probably about now, this month as the clean up efforts were still in full operation. Many more streets and pathways were opened up around the site and I was touring around looking at all of the places I hadn't seen since the attack. I began walking west from Broadway down some side streets and finally to the plaza area just past the WTC and near the atrium at the World Financial Center. There were little manicured trees everywhere covered in plastic bags for protection. The pathways were bordered by green tarps acting as guides to tell the crowds were we could and could not go. Shops were opening up along these paths and it was almost as if the area was full of holiday shoppers. But the air was full of dust just as it was the first few weeks after the attack. It was really hard to see and breath. Everything was enveloped in a very fine film of the dust/ash. I assumed it was because the digging and clean up was so near. As I walked by the shops, looking at everything I saw most curious thing. Two or three people standing in a row, were dressed in strange uniforms with little hats, it appeared almost to be a formal military uniform. Bells were dinging and as I looked closer I saw the sounds were coming from their bicycles. They were Salvation Army Officers beckoning people to come in, to give help and to accept help. Their bicycles were a very old style and were super shiny and olive colored. They were really creepy. It was all creepy, sad and so much was intact, but still so much was utterly destroyed. There were structures that looked perfectly fine next to building which sides were sheared off, with beams and debris hanging down, floors and floors exposed. Then it all became very confusing and strange. I was on a tour demonstrating escape routes from disaster areas. We were asked to try and find our way up a very steep slippery slope. Near the top there was an over-hang and above that I could see there should have been a house but the lot was empty. They only sign was a street number painted on the curb. Everyone on the tour was asian. It was a tour of Japanese seeing what it was like to escape from the WTC disaster. Everyone kept slipping and falling all around me and I had to try hard to avoid being hit by the falling bodies. It was a long way down and I knew if I slipped I would be hurt. To my right was the side of a building, I found a way to grab on to a window and hoist myself up and then jump from the sill to the over-hang. The tour guide was praising me for my efforts on a loud speaker. Helicopters were flying all over the place, the National Guard, troops were everywhere and really even though it was meant to be a memorial day, a day to remember those lost, all that was lost, a day for prayers and hope something else entirely was happening. It was almost as if the city was under military occupation and we were all in grave danger. Then I went into a restaurant that looked like a combo of Balthazar and Pastis. And inside men with guns were in every corner and at the bar and at every table. Then I knew what was really happening. At a booth I saw four men in robes and turbans. I realized it was him along with some of the Sheiks who supported him. Somehow we began talking and I was asking him about Allah and the Koran, how could he reconcile his actions with the teaching of the Koran. We kept talking and arguing. We were both crying and I wanted to kill him. I was trying so hard to stop feeling hate and vengeance, but I wanted to stab him in the heart with a steak knife from the table. It was so hard not to show my anger. We kept talking in circles and circles until nothing made sense and I was so afraid. He wanted to know why I believed that any of our lives were valuable and pointed at some women working behind the bar. The looked like they were Mestizos, such tiny little women and must have been dishwashers or porters, evryone was just staring, but trying to work hard and behave normally. He wanted to know if I really believed that they were chaste and had been only with their husbands. Allah condemned this and therefore it didn't matter if they lived or died just as it was the same for the rest of our society. Then he was back at the booth and I was talking with one of the Sheiks. He looked at me from the table laughing a bit, smiling and nodding at me. I lost my opportunity to kill him. I think I woke up then.
ny - Saturday, January 05, 2002 at 22:54:00 (CST)

there are flesh colored snakes that resemble curled eels in the ground. they are half exposed like clams at low tide. they slither in the thick mud and cause me to rush barefoot around them. you pick me up, but i know your intentions are not pure. i scream for my mother. she is downstairs and my voice can't get to her. you lift me up above your shoulders and put your nose into my crotch and inhale deeply. i am weak.

- Thursday, January 03, 2002 at 09:31:09 (CST)


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